What’s the DSM-5 all about?

You may have heard about the DSM-5 which has recently  been published, but what is it?  It stands for Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders – 5th edition, which is published by the American Psychiatric Association.

It is a very important work, particularly for anyone working in mental health and related fields, as it is the de facto authority on mental health disorders and their classification.  Simply put, it is a manual that describes mental health conditions (such as psychoses and personality disorders) and is used by professionals to aid diagnosis.  Being diagnosed with a mental illness or disorder can be very distressing, and it is important that there are consistent standards of diagnosis, which is one of the aims of the DSM-5.

However, the DSM-5 has been crticised for medicalising certain behaviours or conditions that some say should not be classed as mental disorders.   Here is an excellent article about the DSM-5 on the Mental Elf website that explains it better than I can, so if you’re interested, do have a read:

The DSM-5 and the complexities and capitalising of classification from www.thementalelf.net

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Being Happy

We’d all prefer to be happy all of the time – wouldn’t we? But it’s not always easy to be happy when things aren’t going so well.  Most of the people who come to see me about problems in their lives are not feeling at their happiest when we first meet.  Some seem to have lost touch with how to be happy.  This is especially true for those coping with depression or anxiety, or struggling with major life difficulties such as bereavement. But regaining a measure of happiness when times are tough can make such a huge difference, it’s one of the things I aim to help my clients to do.

It’s important to remember, though,  that being happy all of the time is probably not ideal;   we need ups and downs in life to be able to enjoy the ups.  But that means that we have to cope with the downs too.

So, how to be happy when times are tough?   Here are my tips on how to be more happy more of the time:

  • Be thankful for what you already have.  It’s difficult to be happy if you are constantly thinking about what you don’t have.  By appreciating what is already in your life you will increase your levels of happiness and you will feel gratitude when you do receive more.  This is a simple mindshift, but a very powerful one.  So, look at what you already have to be thankful for.
  • Think of others.  Happy people are more considerate people, they tend to do more for others.  Therefore, by doing more for others you can make yourself feel happier.  Indeed, misery can be quite a selfish state of mind.
  • Remember that things will get better.  It’s just the natural order of things that nothing lasts forever – and that goes for hard times too.  Much as happiness rarely lasts forever, well, nor does sadness. It’s a constantly fluctuating wave.  When you are at your most down, take hope and courage from the fact that you will soon be back on the upward curve.   It may help to look back over your life and to recognise times that have proved this to be true.
  • Accept that hard times can be beneficial too.  This may be a tricky concept to accept, especially when you’re in the middle of the bad times, but the most difficult experiences we go through can also be the most enriching.  Scientists have recently identified the phenomenon of Post Traumatic Growth – which is the flip side of Post Traumatic Stress.  People who have experienced truly dreadful things often claim that it has helped them in some way they could never have imagined.  Again,  look back and identify times in your life that were tough, but from which you gained something – even if it was only a lesson learned.
  • Don’t think that happy people have life easy.  It’s a common misconception that people who always seem to be happy must have charmed lives.  They don’t.  They are just better at dealing with the hard stuff.  So how do they do that? They treat life as a series of experiences, some good, some bad, all of them useful.  They don’t complain that life is unfair – they just get on with life, accept what it gives them, and are grateful for what they get.
  • Focus on the present.  In times of danger we become very present-focused.  Survival in the here and now becomes our only aim.  When our life is not at risk our minds become free to dwell on stuff that has happened in the past, or to worry about what might be in the future.  Yet it’s when we are present- focused that we can be our strongest and most resourceful.  I am not suggesting that we live life in a constant state of risk (though some people seem to enjoy that), but that we try to remain present-focused as much as possible.  We cannot change the past and we have only  limited control over the future, so make the most of the present (it’s a gift, to use the old cliché).
  • Don’t put off being happy. It’s very common for us to delay being happy until…… until you have more money, until you’ve finished studying, until the kids have grown up, until all your problems have gone away…… But you will always have problems, that’s just life – so when will you finally allow yourself to be happy?  How about now?  You don’t need more money/stuff to be happy, and the happiest people are those who don’t put it off.

    Children instinctively know how to be happy

  • Laugh.  Humour is so important. It’s good for the heart and the soul.  And laughter is free.  Spend time with people with whom you can laugh – even over the silliest things. Watch funny movies or TV shows.  Listen to comedy on the radio.  Spend time with youngchildren as they also know the value of humour.  Make a stranger laugh by telling them ajoke….. and learn to laugh at yourself when previously youmay have criticised yourself.

If you have any other tips for happiness I’d love to hear them – you can send them to me by email or tweet me @life_Insight

 

 

 

 

 

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Practising what I preach

One of the biggest challenges for a therapist is that of setting a good example by following the practices that we endorse.  This isn’t always easy!  Like all counsellors/therapists I am only human and have my own weaknesses.  The “best practices” that I seem to struggle with the most are:

1. Finding time to relax
I tell all my clients about the importance of making time, every day, to relax.  Focused relaxation (such as self hypnosis or meditation) is extremely beneficial – just 20 minutes a day can help to de-stress and also to actively realign our conscious and subconscious minds with our goals.  Relaxation is also fantastic for boosting confidence – think about it, when did you ever feel confident when you were stressed or tired?  It’s good for memory too – how many times have you struggled to remember something only to find it popping into your head once you have stopped stressing about it? A short relaxation session every day will boost your mood, your confidence and your memory and yet so many of us just don’t give ourselves time to relax, and I am guilty of this myself.  When I do make the time to do it regularly, it really pays off.  And by relaxing I don’t mean having a cheeky nap, or watching TV, or even reading… the most beneficial type of relaxation is where you are deeply focused on relaxing your body and your mind whilst remaining awake and not distracted; and whilst you should quieten your mind from everyday thoughts, it IS beneficial to allow your creative mind to visualise the things that you do want to achieve – a bit like daydreaming. It feels great, so I wonder why we struggle to do it?

2. No negative thinking
The way we think affects the way we feel and behave.  This is the basis of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy – which is one of the therapeutic techniques I use with my clients.  I teach clients to recognise when they are having negative thoughts then to challenge those thoughts and create more healthy and positive thinking. Done consistently, this leads to  feeling better about oneself and one’s life.  Most of the time I am good at recognising when I am thinking negatively, but I still catch myself doing it.  I might call myself stupid and clumsy if I break something; I may criticise the way I look or  give myself a mental telling off if I think I have done something badly.  It CAN be difficult to get rid of negative thinking completely, but it’s definitely conducive to a much more positive outlook on life.

3. Don’t worry about the future!
Anxiety is a very future focused condition.  Most people who feel anxious are worrying about things that haven’t yet happened. Quite often the things that we worry about are unlikely to happen, or to be as bad as we imagine they might be.  Yet that doesn’t seem to stop us from predicting a future full of calamity and misfortune.  I do it myself – I’m prone to a bit of ‘catastrophising’ as therapists sometimes call it.  I’ll be driving somewhere and before I’ve arrived I will have convinced myself that when I get there I won’t be able to find a parking space and I’ll be late for my appointment.  Yet once there, I sail into a perfect parking spot right outside where I need to be.  Why do we put ourselves through so much angst for no reason?  It may be a misguided attempt to foresee the worst, so that we’re equipped to deal with it if/when it happens.  And that’s not necessarily a bad thing.  I do recommend to my clients that they face up to their fears – so that they can evaluate them and conceive of what the worst outcome might be (and quite often that ‘worst’ isn’t actually as bad as they’d thought it might be).  But then I also ask them to consider the best possible outcome and the most likely outcome too. Thinking logically about our fears in this way can actually reduce anxiety and our tendency to always imagine the worst.

So, now that I’ve confessed to these weaknesses, I am making a promise to myself here and now, that I shall:
– make time to relax every day
– work harder to CUT OUT the negative thinking
– stop worrying about things that probably won’t happen

Wish me luck!

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